Of All People

Hi, again.
WHY ME?! OF ALL PEOPLE, WHY DID THEY HAVE TO PICK ON ME?
I cannot express how...DISGUSTED I am right now. Not just with how these people have treated me, but with myself for letting it happen. More so for the blood that fell from the single cut along my wrist. I didn't want to do it, but I heard people saying that turning the mental pain into something physical made it more bearable. It made me cry more because all I could think was, "How did I allow myself to sink this low?"
My mascara is running right now. I don't even know when I started wearing makeup. It just sort of happened, like the bullying and dying my hair.
Dad stormed the school a few days ago, and he threw one of my tormentors against the wall.
Mum left him because of it, and it is all my fault.
All of it.
If I didn't exist, none of this would have happened.
Anyway, thank you for being here for me again, my six thousand followers. You are the one thing that gives me hope about this world. You and Violet, my one remaining friend. She has been good to me and hasn't left my side at school. I don't know how to repay her for it.
-Louise.